Hey girl, it’s me.
Maybe we are Facebook friends, or we follow each other on Instagram. Perhaps we chat in the school parking lot. We may even hang out on the regular.
You know me.
You just don’t know it is me you are judging. Heck, you might not even know you are judging anyone at all.
But those posts? The ones that start with “I would never let my kid…” or “I would never…”? Yeah, those hit me in the gut.
You see, I am that mom you’re talking about. The one who swears in front of her kids and enjoys alcoholic drinks. The one who lives in a messy house and drives a messy car. The one who feeds her kids fast food and doesn’t blink at the thought of freeze pops, chips, or candy. The one who yells. The one whose kids dress themselves, and who only intervenes if the clothing choices are really bad or seasonally inappropriate. The one whose kids have electronic devices, play Fortnite, and watch YouTube. The one whose kids are loud, sometimes inappropriately behaved, and enjoy jokes about bodily functions. The one who enjoys time away from her kids.
The one who flinches a little when she realizes she is the person you are judging — even if you don’t realize it.
Oh, I know those memes aren’t directed at me personally. But they sting nonetheless.
I would like to say that this post will now take the proud, confident mom turn, and I will type that I don’t care about your posts and just go on living my own fantastic life. But that isn’t what is happening here.
Because girl, I rock the imposter syndrome — and I rock it hard. When I see posts online by other moms touting their perfect lives and listing off things they deem unworthy of being deemed “good” mothering, I feel seen. Any comments from friends or family praising my mom skills go right out the window. Suddenly, I am just that mom. The one that every other mom on the playground must be judging as I glance at my cell phone, even if they are all doing the exact same thing. The inadequate mom who hasn’t quite made it to the level of the other moms around her.
So girl, when you are sharing those memes, I am asking you to pause before you hit post. Who are you aiming them at? Do you know? Is it anyone in particular? Is it me?
Or are you posting that stuff because you are trying to make yourself feel better about your own shortcomings?
Because if that’s the case, you really don’t need to hit post. I think you are a pretty rocking mama.
Even if you do stuff that I wouldn’t.
