There are countless articles about how to find and make friends once you become a mother. When I was pregnant I didn’t think I needed any new friends. I had a large social network-work colleagues, grad school friends, family friends, college roommates, and more. I am by nature a very social person. And most of my friends had become mothers before I did so they had lots of advice to offer.When I actually became a mother I realized that I needed and wanted some new friends. I wanted a new network of like-minded women who were experiencing the same sleep deprivation, breastfeeding complications, and child care woes that I was. I also wanted to share the small victories of getting the baby to take a bottle, going to get my nails done, and actually finding time to read a book.
My first stop was the Baby Cafe in Melrose. This support group for breastfeeding mothers was informative and full of encouragement. I met local women who were beginning the journey to parenthood at the same time I did. We sat around in a comfortable space, shared our stories, and made connections that would last beyond my days as a breastfeeding mother.
The second stop in my “make mom friends journey” was Stroller Strides. This national franchise offered me the opportunity to exercise with my children right along side me. I worked out, got back into shape, released endorphins which helped my well-being, and I made friends. We shared war stories of blow out diapers and finding babysitters while doing burpees and sprints. These women were in the trenches with me and I valued their conversations. These women became friends that I would treasure for years to come because of our commonalities.
When I meet new mothers today I try to explain the value in making Mom friends. I speak from the heart when it comes to this topic because I think it helped me in so many ways. When you become a mother you change and grow. So making new friends as part of the process just makes sense. And while social media, chat rooms, and websites offer information and camaraderie, real live friends are better.
So my advice to all mothers is find a peer group. Look at the library, ask your neighbors, see if your pediatrician’s office has suggestions for you. The Family Network is a great organization that has a lot to offer as well. Hulafrog and Boston Central are local endeavors that post activities for families in your community and neighboring towns.
To all of my friends who are mothers, I salute you!
