What Mom Really Wants for Mother’s Day

By

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May 10, 2019

Dear toddlers,

This Mother’s Day, why not give mom something she’s always wanted?!

Informal polling of a few local moms offered the following suggestions for their toddler children: Broadly speaking, moms’ wish lists from their toddlers include emotional awareness, self-control, some degree of wisdom, and volume control. Also, the verbal ability to communicate why the red plate is so devastating. But these are the really big ticket items, and we understand if these are out of your range. So we’ve assembled a few more reasonable options. Here they are, by category.

Bathrooms

Mom would really love to use toilet paper that hasn’t been re-rolled onto the tube. If you’re looking for a precious gift, why not try giving her her very own roll? If you’re feeling really generous, throw in a voucher for one trip to the bathroom completely alone.

Speaking of bathrooms, you could skip the very loud narration of exactly what mom is doing in the public bathroom stall (“MOM, ARE YOU PEEING?” “MOM, WHAT IS THAT ON YOUR BUM?!”). Local moms agree — she would really appreciate it.

Public appearances

Mom’s been dreaming about the Boston Duckling Day for months — she’s got the costume preordered and it wasn’t even from #AmazonPrime. Want to make her day? Smile adorably while wearing the feathers, don’t run into the tulips screaming, and pose for a photo op without complaint. Give her an #instagramlife IRL for one glorious hour, and she’s guaranteed to smile.

Food

While we’re at it, after she’s ‘grammed it, mom really wants to be able to eat her own food — and have you eat yours. Yes, she knows hers looks better. But it doesn’t after you’ve tried it and spit it back onto her plate, declaring it “dis-dusting.” Give mom a big girl plate of her very own and keep your fingers to yourself for one day!

On the topic of food, we all know iced coffee was invented by a mom who just couldn’t get five minutes to drink her coffee hot. And everyone knows that #BostonRunsOnDunks iced coffee. But regardless of whether it’s hot or cold, can mom please just finish a cup of coffee before the hot kind gets cold or the iced coffee’s ice melts? Choose this one and she’s guaranteed to be awake enough to say thank you.

Sleep

Mom would also really love it if once — just once — in the middle of the night, you would remember that the other parent also can find your missing sock. He’s also trained in giving one last hug, bringing water, and helping you use the potty for the 586,941,457th time.

Oh, and the one traditional gift that never gets old for Mom? Breakfast in bed. Better yet, you can delay the breakfast part and just let her stay in bed, asleep, under the covers, for as long as she wants. If you really want to be an overachiever, you could try sleeping through the night (so she can too). That will win you bragging rights and possibly even favorite child status for a week or two. Throw a couple eggs and some toast that you haven’t licked on top and you’re set for a month.

Miscellaneous

Other things that would really make mom’s day? Spontaneous potty training, lack of public temper tantrums, declarations of undying affection, cards that are funny but not so funny that they make her pee (thank you, third child), flowers that you picked yourself, kindness to your siblings, not undoing what she’s just cleaned up, and lots of sweet kisses.

We hope these suggestions are helpful. Please feel free to pick more than one.

Love,

Moms of toddlers everywhere

To My “Mom Village”

By

Deanna Greenstein

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May 9, 2019

It takes a village to raise a child.

I have heard this phrase all my life. As a young mom, I thought it was a bit silly. I had children, I could deal with raising them. I could feed them and change them and care for them myself. Who needed other moms? I was an independent woman!

Or so I thought.

I don’t remember exactly when my village began to form. Somewhere between the time my older children began school and the time I realized I had more children than I had hands, I started finding myself surrounded by other moms.

Moms who are happy to “mom” not only their own children but mine too.

Moms who do ecstatic celebratory dances in school parking lots when they hear my toddler utter the words, “I pooped in the potty!”

Moms who sit and plan “kid activity Tetris” with me to make sure our entire group gets to where they need to be when they need to be there.

Moms who are quick to respond to an “I’m running late!” text with an “I’ll grab your kids, see you at my house when you can get here.”

Moms who care for my other children well into the night while I rush to the hospital with my broken-armed son.

Moms who drop Gatorade and chicken soup on my front porch when a stomach bug hits all five of my children at once.

Moms who run through my door within minutes when I message that there is an emergency and I need help.

Moms who host birthday parties for my son when I am in the hospital with my premature baby, making sure to live stream singing “Happy Birthday” so the baby and I can both “be there.”

Moms who respond to my clogged-pipe-under-the-kitchen-sink drama by showing up with a laundry basket and ordering me to fill ‘er up with dirty dishes so they can run them through their own dishwashers for me.

Moms who don’t think twice when I ask to use them as an emergency contact (and then dutifully show up to pick up my sick kid when the school nurse calls).

Moms who are willing to cut holes in their T-shirts and hide baby bottles underneath in an attempt to feed my breastfed-only baby while I had surgery.

Moms who will respond to my overwhelmed, “I’m at the end of my rope with these kids today” texts by showing up with homemade apple dip and wine.

Moms who know my coffee order and do drive-by coffee dropoffs.

Moms who I, without question, would do any of these things for in return.

Moms who started off as just faces in a school parking lot, and without my realizing it, became my beloved village. Sisters who love my children as their own, just as I do theirs.

The village that I, as a naïve new mom, didn’t realize I needed.

The village I am so very, very thankful to have found.

To my mom village — thank you. I couldn’t do this “raising kids thing” without you. And I am so very glad I don’t have to.

To Gray or Not to Gray

By

Jessie Keppeler

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May 8, 2019

gray hair - Boston Moms Blog — Photo courtesy Tobias Maier.

As all you loyal readers know (hi, Mom!), I’m 40. And so far, 40’s not so bad. Do I forget my computer password on a daily basis? Sure I do. Do I occasionally wake up without being able to move my neck? Of course. But otherwise, 40 is great.

When you’re 40, you can wear sweatpants and a defiant smile that says, “I’ve earned these.” You care less about a few extra pounds on the scale and more about the continual beating of your heart. And you can reminisce about your 30s with the wisdom that comes from a few months of age: “Oy, I used to wear low-cut jeans in my 30s. Before I rediscovered my sweatpants.”

But one thing that’s not so great about 40 is gray hair. Unless you’re blessed with fantastic genes or beautiful blonde hair (where a gray might just politely disappear into the shiny yellow), you may also find yourself in this situation one day. I, too, was once a blonde (ahem, when I was 3) but my hair has grown progressively darker over the years so that it’s close to black today. And boy, do grays show up in close-to-black hair. My hairline is suddenly a serious “50 shades of gray” situation, and not the sexy kind.

So what’s a girl of 40 to do?

Fight back? I can start coloring my hair and buy some time. I can highlight, balayage, or all-over dye at the salon. Or I can highlight at home or use a DIY root-touch-up kit. All these options have their own risks and rewards, and they all require some commitment on my part.

I think on the maintenance scale, I come in pretty low. I pluck my own stray eyebrow hairs, trim my own fingernails, and only splurge on pedicures in the summer. Sure, I do get frequent haircuts, but sometimes I skip the dry. And the last time I experienced a blowout was when my kids were in diapers.

So my other option is to do nothing. I can let nature take over and see what happens. Who knows, I might end up looking like one of those fabulous silver-haired ladies — a more mature, more chic version of myself.

gray hair - Boston Moms Blog I have a friend going this route, and man, is she chic. Sonya was cool with black hair, and if possible, she’s even more so as her hair grows out into a glossy light gray. (See photo.) I asked her about going gray, and she said the hardest part was how other women felt about it. “Friends and strangers alike would ask me why I wanted to look old — and tell me I was making a huge mistake.”

Luckily Sonya is a strong, confident woman who was able to realize that these women had issues with her gray hair that had nothing to do with her. So she kept going, and as her real hair has taken over she gets more positive comments and fewer negative ones. She still gets asked why she’s going natural (like it’s the strangest thing in the world!), and she sums it up with three little words:

“Because it’s easy.”

This really resonates with me. Sonya isn’t trying to make a statement, she’s just letting nature take its course. If anything, she’s letting her hair do the talking, and you know what her fabulous gray hair is saying?

That it’s OK to be real.

Free-Range Walking in the City (Safely!)

By

Kristen D

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May 7, 2019

safety - Boston Moms Blog

I grew up in the middle of nowhere. Literally. My town boasts a robust 2,000 people — and I grew up in a “suburb” of that town, where there were more cows than people. It was a huge deal when they debated putting in a stoplight — because there hadn’t been any before!

I was raised free range before it was a thing.

As a parent, I want to give my children the independence that I value from my youth. When it comes to moving around in the city, I don’t want to overprotect my kids, but I also want them to be safe. And I recognize that that looks different in the city.

We let our three young kids run and scoot ahead of us, sometimes further than other parents are comfortable with. But it’s because we’ve laid a solid groundwork that I feel comfortable doing so. Here are some of the things we’ve done to teach our children to be both independent and safe!

Start as you mean to go on.

When we were (whisper) sleep training my first son, a wise mom told me, “However you do it, start as you mean to go on.” Meaning, build skills and tools now that will enable you to live the life you want later.

Our goal was to be able to trust our kids to walk or scooter with us — and not having to yell at them constantly. I wanted them to know how to not bowl over pedestrians (still our greatest challenge), stop a safe distance from intersections, and cross a street safely and independently.

I have three children — a 6-year-old, a 4-year-old, and a rowdy 2-year-old. What I allow my 6-year-old to do, I would never allow my 2-year-old to do at age 2. However, I am laying the foundation for her now — because she is capable of more than we think.

Everything is age appropriate — but it builds on itself.

When our kids graduate from riding in the stroller, they hold our hands to walk. But we begin to let them walk short distances in enclosed spaces, with us nearby giving strong verbal and hand signal cues. We play red light, green light, and I teach them how to stop immediately, on cue, way before I ever let them practice on city streets.

It begins as a game, but it builds skills they need to be more independent. Non-verbal cues are helpful, too, because sometimes it’s difficult to hear outside (a hand up like a stop sign means stop, etc.). When I see that they respond reliably to my cues, then we practice in the middle of blocks, away from intersections.

I increase independence when they demonstrate that they are ready — and I take it away immediately when they don’t listen.

Once my sons mastered stopping on command, they were allowed to scooter ahead, as long as they checked back and immediately responded when I cued to stop. Any time they do not immediately stop, we revert back to a previous level, no matter their previous independence.

I tell them my trust is earned.

Our rule for intersections is that they need to stop well before the intersection and that “we always hold hands when we cross the street.” (I repeat the same phrases so that they become ingrained.) We tell them, “I know you are going to stop, but cars might not know that, so you need to reassure them.” This buys me safety space, should someone trip, and it teaches them that we never run into a street. Everyone has to “look both ways, even if you are with a grown-up,” starting from day one.

Every step, we are looking toward the next step.

As my oldest son has demonstrated trustworthiness, we are building the skills he needs to gain further independence. He no longer has to hold my hand to cross streets, because I know he’ll stay close and not run recklessly. Now when we come to an intersection, I ask him, “Are we safe to cross?” He gets to make the decision — but I have to sign off before we move forward. Before I trust him to do it independently, I am teaching him the skills he needs to do it safely.

At 6, he’s not ready to walk somewhere all by himself. But when he’s a few years older, he will be ready, because we’ve laid the foundations now.

In the meantime, he’s proud of himself because he feels trusted and independent. And my life is easier because I am able to trust him.

**How do you navigate walking in the city with small children? How do you promote independence and safety?**

Our Family Doesn’t Go to Museums Together, and This Is Why

By

Annie Claflin

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May 6, 2019

museums - Boston Moms Blog — Photo courtesy Annie Claflin Photography, LLC.

As a photographer, I feel a strong urge to develop my son’s appreciation for art. Yet every opportunity to bond with my son over the arts has been thwarted by toddler wonder. I have readjusted my expectations for my toddler’s “art readiness” and have learned the following valuable lessons:

1. My son has no patience for my artistic endeavors.

While exercising my creative photographic expression the other morning, my son bull-rushed my camera. He was so excited to view the glowing image (of him) on my LCD screen that he rammed his forehead against my lens. I first gauged the severity of his wound, then I put down my camera and picked up my son. I quickly realized that toddler supervision and conducting photography shoots are separate activities in our household for the time being.

2. I think like an art historian, not a toddler.

When I crave a dose of fine art, I imagine “old masters'” paintings at the MFA. When I want a dose of contemporary art, I envision looking at charred wood pieces hanging from the ceiling of the ICA. I want my son to gaze at these artworks and marvel at the talented minds that created them. Instead, the last time we visited the MFA, I had to sweep his running legs off the floor and into our “emergency backup stroller” before he tripped over a barrier and into a Murakami mural. We haven’t been to an art museum together since. Incorporating high art into my toddler’s life is a dangerous proposition not only to him but also to the cultural institutions that welcome him.

3. Art is dead to my toddler, and so I adjust.

I’ve distanced myself from my arts-inspired, pre-motherhood life, and I’ve readjusted my mindset about how my son can enjoy art. I would love for my son to appreciate the finer qualities of a Rembrandt drawing, but I will accept his appreciation for drawing with crayons. I’d rather my son pound his fists on his plastic keyboard than our friend’s grand piano. He is still learning to be creative by exploring the possibilities of three-dimensional space with Play-Doh; he doesn’t have to contemplate a Rodin sculpture.

4. But don’t let this prevent you from exploring cultural institutions with your kids.

There are many benefits to exposing kids to art early in life, including the development of critical thinking and self-esteem. Many museums in the Boston area have developed programs specifically for kids because of these merits. Notably, the MFA playdates and the ICA ‘s kids and families programs incorporate kids’ activities within the context of current exhibits at the museum. For music lovers, the Boston Symphony Orchestra also hosts family-friendly events and concerts for very young people. I hear rave reviews about these events, but for the moment, our family’s musical enjoyment centers on dancing around to hip-hop together and snapping together Lego Duplo pieces.

5. Also, you can find — and teach — art to your kids in everyday life.

In my mind, I want to drag my son to every gallery opening across the city. Many artistically inclined folks do just this and manage to have very young museum-minded children. I envy them, but I’ll take at-home arts and crafts activities with my son over a trip with him to the Fuller Craft Museum (despite the fact that their current photography exhibit looks amazing). You’re more likely to find us at the local park with some sidewalk chalk or at home discussing the elements that comprise the works illustrated in “Art for Baby.” We spend the afternoons reading, but I do see “open studio” days in our near future. All is not lost on this artist mother and her toddler.

Raising Confident Girls (and Boosting Our Own Confidence)

By

Ranessa Doucet

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May 2, 2019

The other day, my 8-year-old daughter and I were looking through pictures when she came across one of herself from the beginning of the school year. It was far from a professional photo and her hair was a mess, but she said, “I look great in this picture!” It struck a chord with me, because I can’t recall a time recently when I looked at myself and said — or thought — “I look great!”

My daughter smiles when she looks in the mirror as she adds a sparkly necklace or bow in the mornings. When she looks in that mirror, she’s not judging herself. She also regularly comments on how good she is at hip-hop, math, cartwheels, and drawing. Although she’s not an expert in any of these things, she compliments herself freely and without self-doubt. The amazing thing is, she also freely compliments others. She tells me I look pretty and that my singing is beautiful, even when I sound like Kermit the Frog with a cold.

I want her to hold onto this confidence, and I wish I could have some of it too. When she commented on the picture, it made me wonder why so many of us lose this confidence. According to the authors of the book “The Confidence Code For Girls,” girls’ confidence levels fall by 30 percent between the ages of 8 and 14.

We are so hard on ourselves, as women, and we hold ourselves to standards none of us can achieve. When was the last time you looked at yourself in the mirror and thought you were beautiful? When was the last time you really believed in your abilities? In the world of social media, we tend to have a skewed perspective. Everyone’s life seems perfect, and everyone looks beautiful under the veil of an Instagram filter. If we are judging ourselves harshly, our daughters will do the same. We need to be kinder to ourselves, so they know how to be kind to themselves too.

What if we tried looking at ourselves like our children do? Weight would be lifted off our shoulders. The constant pressure we put on ourselves can be heavy. I’m not suggesting anyone send their headshots into Wilhelmina Models or try out for American Idol (unless that’s your lifelong dream). But we should give ourselves a break and focus on our strengths.

One way to help our daughters build confidence is to show them how to get out of their comfort zones sometimes. This means different things for different girls, such as trying a new sport, speaking up in class, or playing with a new friend. If she fails, help her work through it and rebound so she will be ready if she fails again. Exposure will normalize failure.

To help our daughters, we need to occasionally model risk and failure ourselves by getting out of our comfort zones. For me, it’s about writing and putting myself out there in words. Sometimes writing can be scary, and it can come with rejection, but I keep going with the hope that what I write will resonate with someone. For you, it could be running a race, starting a business, or taking a class. If we never take risks because we are afraid to fail, our daughters see and emulate that.

I don’t have all the answers for how we can help our daughters hold on to their confidence. What I do know is that it’s something we should be conscious of. There’s power in confidence, and we certainly don’t want our girls to lose that!

Tips and Tricks for Managing the Large (or Busy) Family

By

Rachel Rich

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May 1, 2019

As soon as I became pregnant with number four, we gave in to the call of the minivan, started looking for a bigger house, and began researching large families. I knew I was going to have to uncover some secrets and learn the ropes of managing our new, larger family. While I haven’t quite found or mastered all the tricks, here are a few I’ve come to rely on.

Keep lunches simple (and make them at night).

I do not focus on variety. My kids don’t like variety. And I don’t like making food and throwing it away. So I stick with what works. Lunches follow a basic formula — one main food, one fruit, one veggie, one cheese stick, milk box or juice, and a treat. I finish it off with a sweet note from mom. That’s it. Every day. All four lunches are made at once, the night before, and placed into the fridge. In the morning we heat up any hot food and put it into a warmed thermos, tossing in an ice pack to keep everything else cold. I even prepare lunches for my two who stay home. When it’s time for lunch, no matter where we are, the food is ready to go!

Have a basic monthly food plan.

I’m still working on this one, but I hear it’s wonderful once you get into the routine. So far I’ve categorized my days for each meal — Mondays are chicken, Tuesdays are Tex/Mex, Wednesdays and Thursdays are slow cooker, and Friday is an order-in kinda night. Beef, leftovers, and/or eating out are reserved for the weekends. I hope to eventually use these categories to plan the meals for the month based on what I know how to make and what the family enjoys eating. I’m using basic planning templates from the internet to keep it organized. From the calendar, I should easily be able to compile a grocery list twice a week. Check out these posts for more great ideas on meal planning.

Have it ALL delivered.

We have groceries delivered through Peapod or Prime Now (Whole Foods). We get our diapers from Amazon and Honest Company. Paper supplies and pantry food are delivered from Amazon’s Prime Pantry (Target also has great prices for these items), and our cleaning supplies are delivered by Grove. Most of these companies offer a subscription, so the goods are automatically delivered. This works great for us, especially for oversized and heavy pet supplies. I never worry about about taking care of our three cats! Anything else we need, such as gifts, hand towels, birthday party supplies, event-specific outfits, and general day-to-day items I order on Amazon when I can. I pay for Prime so my items arrive in a matter of days. Because we are a large family, we run out of something every day. Having most of it delivered has saved us many trips out.

Fold the laundry right out of the dryer.

I have four bins next to our washer and dryer. One bin (differentiated by color) for each child. I fold the clothing item and put it directly into the correct bin. I can do this for several loads before I have to put the clothes away. Eventually, the goal is to have a day set aside where the kids collect their bins and put their own clothes away. While my oldest is capable, the girls are still a bit young. The plan is in place, though! As for my own laundry, I simply stack it and put it away.

Keep a potty and a trash bag in the car.

I have two toddlers and two young “big kids,” so this tip is a must! A trash bag hangs off a hook on one of the front seats and is taken out of the car full every other day — and my car is still covered in socks, cookie crumbs, and clutter. I can only imagine what it would be like if I didn’t have a trash bag there!

As for a potty, we’ve avoided many accidents, kept potty training in place, and nurtured confidence due to the availability of a travel potty. It comes in handy on the road when no bathroom is in sight, when going to the beach, during or after potty training, and when in a toddler (or little big kid) emergency.

Simplify the bag.

I carry only what I need. The days of toys, books, extra snacks, and blankets are no longer. Diapers, wipes, a change of clothes, my wallet, event-specific gear, and a book are all I take with me. I usually tuck it all into a small purse and ditch the diaper bag at home. The kiddos eat less food on the run and more food when I prepare it. If they want a snack, they get it and bring it along (and, in theory, throw the trash into the car trash bag!).

Purge constantly.

I’m constantly getting rid of stuff. Outgrown clothing, broken and unused toys, tchotchke, and multiples of an item are all constantly coming in and going out of our house. I try to donate as often as I can. Big Brother Big Sister comes to our town monthly and picks up donation items at the house. Savers takes most everything and is an easy drop-off. The transfer station in our town takes clothing and book donations. I have donated extra Lego to local schools, passed baby and maternity items on to expecting and new moms, and freely shared items we no longer needed with friends and strangers. Next, I want to have a yard sale!

Having a big family is a lot of fun, and with the day-to-day systems working for us we can keep the focus where it should be — our family.

Getting-Out Guide :: Boston’s Best Activities for Families This May

By

Deanna Greenstein

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April 30, 2019

We are so excited to partner with Goldfish Swim School to bring you this Guide to May!

April showers have given way to May flowers! There are many events in and around Boston this May, guaranteeing that you and your family will have tons of ways to enjoy springtime in our fantastic city! Check out our monthly events guide, brought to you by Goldfish Swim School, to get some great ideas for family fun!

In addition to this guide, our calendar has daily events listed to keep you active and entertained this month!

We’ve also included links to area libraries and recurring events. We know this is not a comprehensive list, so if you think of any fun family activities we missed, please share them with us in the comments.

If you are looking to connect with other moms near you, make sure to join our Community & Conversation Group!

May 1–6

May 4 :: Family Printmaking with Coco Berkman :: Sawyer Free Library, Gloucester

Families are invited to join together and create a small self-portrait print. Participants will be provided with paper, fabric, and flat textures to glue onto a piece of cardboard to create their image, which is then rolled with ink and hand rubbed until their masterpiece is completed!

May 4 :: Bird Carving Demonstration with Paul Phillips :: Harwich Cultural Center, Harwich

As a part of Boston Art Week demonstrations, decoy maker Paul Phillips will demonstrate the art of decoy carving. Paul is an experienced woodworker and carver who volunteers at the Elmer Crowell Barn (part of the Brooks Academy Museum). He will share his knowledge about the folk art of decoy birds and decorative bird art, and create a demonstration for all to enjoy.

May 5 :: SSC Youth Orchestra Concert :: Duxbury High School Performing Arts Center, Duxbury

SSC Youth Orchestra provides an opportunity for dedicated young musicians from all over the South Shore to perform symphonic music at a high level. The orchestra invites the community to join them for their final concert of the year. The performance is preceded with an “instrument petting zoo,” where youngsters can get up close and personal with the instruments featured later in the program.

May 5 and May 12 :: Exploring With the New England Aquarium :: East Boston, Jamaica Plain

Get your hands wet while you meet some interesting local ocean animals! Educators from the New England Aquarium will be on hand to facilitate family-friendly STEM activities and answer your questions about tidepools!

These free events will take place from 1–3 p.m. at BCYF Paris Street Community Center (112 Paris Street, East Boston) on Sunday, May, 5, and from 1–3 p.m. at Curtis Hall (20 South Street, Jamaica Plain) on Sunday, May 12.

May 7–13

May 10–June 8 :: Boston Ballet Presents Cinderella :: Citizens Bank Opera House, Boston

You are invited to the Royal Ball! Boston Ballet presents Cinderella, an enchanting full-length classic fairytale ballet. For a limited time, youth ages 17 and under receive 50% off ticket prices with the purchase of one full-priced ticket. For more information, visit bostonballet.org or call 617.695.6955.

May 11 :: Zootopia :: Franklin Park Zoo, Boston

At Zootopia, Zoo New England’s annual fundraising gala, guests will enjoy a cocktail reception, auction, dinner, dancing, and the opportunity to meet some of the zoo’s animal ambassadors.

May 12 :: Lilac Sunday at the Arnold Arboretum :: Arnold Arboretum, Jamaica Plain

A tradition since 1908, Lilac Sunday is a beautiful way to spend Mother’s Day! The beautiful plants are mainly located on the edge of Bussey Hill Road. Tours of the lilacs and family activities are available from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. Picnicking is permitted in the Arboretum on this day only. Please bring your own food, as there will be no food vendors. The landscape is open from dawn until dusk.

May 12 :: Mother’s Day Brunch and Stroll :: Norman Smith Environmental Education Center, Milton (Mass Audubon, Blue Hills Reservation)

Celebrate Mother’s Day with a delicious pancake brunch followed by a guided hike in the woods, led by one of the naturalists. Search for birds and enjoy the beautiful wildflowers and views from atop Chickatabut Hill. In the event of rain, there will be a live animal presentation in place of the hike.

May 12 :: Mother’s Day at Stone Zoo and Franklin Park Zoo :: Stoneham and Boston

Celebrate Mom at Franklin Park and Stone Zoos this Mother’s Day with free admission for all mothers throughout the day.

May 14–20

May 16 :: Take Aparts :: Discovery Museum, Acton

Are your little ones constantly taking things apart to see what is inside? Have you always wondered what the inside of your computer or television looked like? Come to the Discovery Museum, grab a screwdriver, and check it out at this interactive event, sponsored by Analog Devices Inc.

May 16–19 :: The Perils of Mr. Punch :: Puppet Showcase Theater, Brookline

Audience members will jump in on the journey detailing the ongoing troubles of Mr. Punch, puppetry’s favorite loudmouth. Join Mr. Punch as he and the Bozo Brothers sing their way through trouble, adventure, and triumph in this hilarious new production by Modern Times Theater. In addition to this hilarious puppet show, the program also features a concert, where the audience will enjoy music ranging from early jazz to American folk, played on everything from a ukulele to a bike pump!

May 18 :: Franklin Park Coalition’s Kite and Bike Festival :: Pierpont Road, Boston

Pack a picnic, grab your kites and bikes, and join others at this joyous annual festival! Guests will be entertained by kite-making activities, games, and activities led by Playworks, Appalachian Club’s OutdoorsRX, and Biking in Boston. There will also be food vendors, face painting, and live music performances!

May 18 :: Free Ferry Day :: Boston Harbor Cruises, Long Wharf North

Thanks to generous funders, Boston Harbor Cruises is able to once again offer free tickets on selected days throughout the warm-weather months! Free tickets for the Boston Harbor Cruises ferry will be distributed on a first come, first serve basis at the Ferry Center on Long Wharf North beginning at 8:30 a.m. Each adult in line may pick up a maximum of four tickets. No tickets will be given out at the Boston Harbor Islands Welcome Center on the Greenway or Long Wharf South ticket booth.

May 18 :: Family Design Day – Treehouses :: BSA Space, Boston

In this fun workshop, families learn how architects create strong structures that give more to the earth than they take from it. Families will be guided through creating their own trees from cardboard and wood and then designing and building a treehouse to rest in its branches. This program is best for children between 5 and 13 years old, and there is a ratio of one adult to three children.

May 21–27

May 23 :: Garden of Flags Name-Reading Ceremony :: Boston Common

Each year, more than 37,000 flags are placed on Boston Common in front of the Soldiers and Sailors Monument to commemorate the Massachusetts service members who have given their lives to defend the United States since the Revolutionary War. Flags will be placed on Wednesday, May 22, beginning at noon. A name reading ceremony will be held in front of the flag display on Thursday, May 23, to commemorate the Massachusetts service members killed since September 11, 2001.

May 25 :: Annual Memorial Day Services :: Veteran’s Memorial Park, Boston

The 73rd annual Memorial Day Services will be held at Veteran’s Memorial Park in Boston beginning at 11 a.m. on Saturday, May 25. This beautiful park hosts monuments commemorating those who fought in World War II, the Korean War, and the Vietnam War, and can be found near the Kelleher Rose Gardens.

May 25 :: Descendants Character Meet and Greet :: Waterford’s Restaurant and Pub, Dedham

Get geared up for the premiere of the third Descendants movie with this exciting event. Meet your favorite characters ahead of the summer release of Descendants 3! Tickets include a hot buffet brunch, printed photos with all the characters, and themed arts and crafts!

May 25 and May 26 :: Blue Butterfly Peace Lanterns :: ArtBeat, Arlington

This annual Memorial Day event reminds us that peace is something we make together. Participants will add paper designs to white lanterns to create glowing reminders of our role in a peaceful planet. This event is best suited for children ages 8 and over, but children as young as 4 are invited to participate with their families.

May 26 :: Wareham Oyster Festival :: Wareham

Celebrate all things shellfish at this free street festival! Guests will enjoy local seafood (and some non-seafood treats for the landlubbers!), wine and beer, live music, a 5K walk, and craft vendors.

May 26 :: Institute of Contemporary Art Free Admission Day :: ICA, Boston

Visit the Institute of Contemporary Art on Memorial Day and receive free admission. From 11 a.m. to 4 p.m., visitors are invited to use stencils and special artist markers to create their own art on acetate paper.

May 28–31

May 29 :: World Otter Day at Stone Zoo :: Stone Zoo, Stoneham

Learn more about these adorable and fascinating creatures at the Stone Zoo while celebrating World Otter Day! Find out fun facts, such as how fast an otter can swim and how long they can hold their breath underwater, and learn how we humans can help to protect and preserve the species!

May 31 :: PJ Library Community Shabbat Picnic and Drum Circle :: Whittemore-Robins House Lawn, Arlington

Join PJ Library for the annual Community Shabbat picnic at the Whittemore-Robins House Lawn from 6–7:30 p.m. Tony Fonseca from All Hands Drumming will guide families in a kid-friendly drum circle! Guests are asked to bring their own picnics, and grape juice, challah, and cookies will be provided.

May 31 :: Duke Ellington’s Sacred Jazz :: Bethel A.M.E. Church, Jamaica Plain

An amazing array of talented musicians will present excerpts from Duke Ellington’s Sacred Jazz works at this moving event. Singers from People’s Baptist Church, teens from Boston City Singers, Paul White jazz trio, a narrator, and a tap dancer at Bethel will perform these works at the A.M.E. Church in Jamaica Plain.

Library Storytimes

Ongoing Events

Storytime at Showcase Cinema de Lux :: Patriot Place, Foxborough :: Tuesdays, 11 a.m.

This free weekly storytime takes place every Tuesday at Showcase Cinema de Lux. After a story reading, a special character makes a weekly appearance followed by a short movie.

Public Telescope Nights at New England Sci-Tech :: 16 Tech Circle, Natick :: Tuesdays and Fridays, 8–9 pm

The public is invited to join New England Sci-Tech for an evening of astronomy during the spring, summer, and fall months. Depending on staff availability, inside activities such as planetarium shows and visiting the astronomy classrooms may be available. Visitors are also invited to borrow smaller “starblast” telescopes to use on their own.

Recreation Sundays on Memorial Drive :: Memorial Drive, Cambridge :: Sundays, May–November

Every Sunday, from the last Sunday of April to the second Sunday of November, Memorial Drive is closed to traffic between Western Avenue and Mount Auburn Street — and open to recreation! Ride a bike or scooter, take a jog, or bring your baby on a leisurely stroll down this usually busy road while you enjoy the beautiful views of the Charles River!

Urban Air Sensory Friendly Jump/Play Time :: Bellingham :: Sundays, 9 a.m.

This event is specifically designed for children with autism and special needs to enjoy time at the park and have a lot of fun without loud music and flashing lights! The lights will be white and music/video games turned off for those with sensory challenges during this time.

Baby-Friendly Monday Matinees at the Capitol Theatre :: Arlington :: Mondays, 12–2 p.m.

The Capitol Theatre features a baby-friendly movie every Monday afternoon. Please check the theater’s Monday schedule to see what feature has been selected for parents and their infants.

Kids’ Art Club :: Dorchester :: Tuesdays, 4:30–5:30 p.m.

This club has a new art project at the library every Tuesday. Projects include collage self-portraits and artist’s books. Art Club projects are showcased in rotating displays in the library children’s room.

Nature Time at Blue Hills Trailside Museum :: Milton :: Thursdays, 10:30–11:30 a.m.

Introduce your preschool-aged child to nature with this fun program. Programs may feature a story, nature games, crafts, short walks outside, or meeting one of the museum’s animal residents. Meet, play, and learn with other area families. Each program runs for 45 minutes and meets most Thursdays. Museum admission is included with this program. Children must be accompanied by an adult.

JFN Free Friday Playgroup :: Natick :: Fridays, 9:30–11:30 a.m.

Bring the little ones and come join other parents and caregivers in the Metrowest area for a fun-filled morning of play and socializing. There are plenty of songs, activities, toys, snacks, and laughter, as both the children and their grown-ups build connections and lasting friendships.

Backyard and Beyond: Forest Fridays :: Acton :: Fridays, 10–11 a.m.

A great way for the whole family to enjoy time outdoors, the Forest Friday program is held outside, no matter the weather. Every Friday morning there is a nature-based activity based on the weather and season, either in Discovery Woods or out on the adjacent conservation land. All ages are welcome but activities are designed for 2- to 6-year-olds. Please note that the conservation land trails are not ADA or stroller accessible; please wear appropriate footwear and clothing.

Storytime at the Curious George Store :: Cambridge :: Fridays, 10:30–11 a.m.

Small children and their caregivers are welcome at these weekly storytimes, running throughout the year.

SaturPLAY :: Rose Kennedy Greenway – Chinatown :: Boston :: Select Saturdays, 1–3 p.m.

The Asian Community Development Corporation’s youth program, A-VOYCE, hosts a placemaking event monthly to activate and bring children to The Greenway’s Mary Soo Hoo Park. Each month features a different theme with games, activities, crafts, and more. Youth volunteers are on hand to engage children. SaturPlay is subject to weather conditions.

ImprovBoston Family Show :: Cambridge :: Saturdays, 4–5 p.m.

Improv Boston’s improv and music extravaganza is completely made up on the spot every week based on your suggestion. No two shows are alike! Best of all, children who want to participate have opportunities to be on stage and take part in the fun! The show is ideal for family outings, birthday parties, and school field trips. It’s fun for the whole family and best for children ages 4-12.

Celebrate Independent Bookstore Day in Boston!

By

Rachel Wilson

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April 26, 2019

I’ve always loved bookstores. When I was little, my grandma would take me to our local mall for the newest Baby-Sitters Club book. More recently, when my husband and I decided to make the move to the suburbs, I focused on towns with a bearable commute into Boston and an indie bookstore!

Tomorrow, the last Saturday in April, is Independent Bookstore Day, and Boston has some great ones! Check them out:

Porter Square Books :: Cambridge

Located in the heart of Porter Square, this shop‘s staff share their book picks via their “Ideal Bookshelves.” Grab a coffee and a pastry from the in-house coffee shop, Cafe Zing.

Book Ends :: Winchester

In addition to its great selection of books, Book Ends won the Retailers Association of Massachusetts Award of Excellence in Community Service in 2017.

Belmont Books :: Belmont

Check out this store‘s events calendar, with open mic nights, trivia nights, monthly book clubs, and author events.

Harvard Book Store :: Cambridge

Expect nothing less than a great selection and awesome author events at this Harvard spot. Score great deals at the warehouse sale that happens several times a year.

Trident Booksellers and Cafe :: Boston

You’ll find Trident at one end of Newbury Street, close to Mass Ave. Come for the books, stay for the brunch!

I AM Books :: Boston

Located in the North End, this bookstore focuses on Italian and Italian-American authors, books in Italian, and Italy-related subject matter.

MIT Press Bookstore :: Cambridge

Located in Kendall Square, this shop has a number of books dedicated to science, but it also boasts a children’s section!

Wellesley Books :: Wellesley

In addition to its outsanding children’s department and its excellent selection of new fiction and nonfiction books, this store has a basement devoted to used books!

Brookline Booksmith :: Brookline

We love their website‘s “weekly bestsellers” section for recommendations, and their basement devoted to used books is a must-visit!

Children’s Book Shop :: Brookline

Said to be Greater Boston’s oldest independent children’s bookstore, this shop‘s extensive stock is carefully hand-selected.

Newtonville Books :: Newton Centre

Check their website for reading challenges, a survey of writers on their influences, and an extensive list of films based on books — which you can rent from their shop!

New England Mobile Book Fair :: Newton Upper Falls

Visit this spot for floor to ceiling books!

Blue Bunny Books and Toys :: Dedham

Owned by children’s book author and illustrator Peter H. Reynolds, this shop offers toys and art supplies in addition to books.

Papercuts JP :: Boston

It’s Boston’s smallest indie bookstore!

The Silver Unicorn Bookstore :: Acton

Bean bag chairs in the kids’ section create a cozy spot for reading at this fun shop.

The Concord Bookshop :: Concord

Pick up a book at this downtown Concord spot and head to Walden Pond for some quiet reading time.

Whitelam Books :: Reading

Visit this shop for story/song time and knitting meet-ups in addition to author events.

The Runaway Mother (and the Need for Self-Care)

By

Sarah Casimiro

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April 25, 2019

“Mommy’s back!” welcomes me as I walk in the door. It’s a glorious end to my first postpartum run and attempt at self-care, until I look at my husband’s face, both irritated and overwhelmed, as he feeds our 3-month-old a bottle. “Ceci didn’t stop screaming or whining the entire time you were gone. She was an ogre and didn’t listen to anything I said. Addie started crying as soon as you walked out the door. It’s like she sensed it.”

And just like that, my runner’s buzz evaporates.

At this point in time, I am my 3-year-old’s favorite. This means that wherever I go, she goes. Whatever I do, she does. And whatever she needs, mommy must fulfill. I admit that being wanted and needed is a wonderful feeling. I love being loved. But it is also exhausting.

I’m pretty sure my husband thinks my daughters and I spend our time together plotting against him — like we hatch plans that exclude him and make him feel like an outsider. If only we were so organized.

Being the favorite means an inquisitor accompanies me on every bathroom trip. Occasionally, when I escape to the bathroom alone and lock the door, I hear knocking, handle-jiggling, and demands: “Open the door!” and “Come out, you!” When I shower, there’s a 3-foot-1 dictator standing outside the shower door asking, “Whatchu doin, Mommy?” and “Mama, what’s this thing?” about something I cannot see and she cannot explain. When I go to Target, she goes to Target; if she has to potty, I hold her hand; when I get a chai from Starbucks, she has to try it. Every evening, at bedtime, my husband asks if he can read her a story. Her response: “How about Mama?”

How about Mama?

Mama is tired. Mama needs time to decompress. And if that means going for a run for 35 or 40 minutes, she should be able to, without feeling a horrible sense of guilt when she returns home. After that first run, I pulled aside my 3-year-old and told her Mommy needs her to be a good girl for Daddy when Mommy leaves the house. I also explained to my husband that I was sorry she was so difficult but that the prospect of not being able to enjoy some much-needed self-care was daunting.

Amazingly, it worked. My subsequent runs still conclude with “Mommy’s home!” but with less frustration from my husband — and better behavior from my 3-year-old. The baby still cries, but we’re working on that.

Believe me, I know this phase will be short-lived. I know she will move on. One day, I will not be her favorite. She will pick my husband, or her nana, or someone else to be kind and loving to, and I will most likely retreat into a corner to cry, longing for her toddler years. I remind myself to indulge in her hand-holding, her on-looking, and her insistence to be wherever mama is, because exhaustion is a small price to pay for this kind of love. I will take comfort in the fact that she, her sister, and my husband will be OK if I escape for a moment of self-care, and when I return, I will resume my prestigious position of potty hand-holder, bedtime story-reader, bagel-with-cream-cheese feeder, and superhero/princess sidekick.

Mastering the Juggle :: Kids + Graduate School

By

Boston Moms

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April 24, 2019

Graduate school, round two, took me a long time. Though I sped through my master’s in Jewish studies right after undergrad, shaving off a semester of coursework by front-loading courses and exams, the second time around was a radically different pace. I was pursuing a doctorate this time, but I don’t think that was really the difference.

I was also pursuing a family.

To my pregnant mind, this seemed ideal. Aside from time in class teaching (or learning), I would have the flexibility to parent AND get my work done on my own schedule. I recognized there would be some sleepless nights ahead from one or both of these sources, but that seemed like a fine trade-off for being able to pull these two feats off simultaneously. Both, it should be noted, felt time-bound to me; they also both felt like essential steps in the future I was planning.

This was the beginning of constantly recalibrating the balance of the personal and professional, present and future. And although my doctorate took as many years to conceive and birth as the kids took months, some of the gleanings along the way still comfort and inform me today, especially as I work with men and women seeking to strike that balance as they consider graduate school.

Here are some tools that helped me along the way:

1. Find the right partners who believe in and see you holistically.

This starts at home but extends to family, friends, advisors, and even doctors who value you, your time, your ambitions, and your whole self. They recognize the interconnection between your parent and student identities and help you grow in both roles, rather than privileging one over another.

2. Seek out the institutions and people whose values align with your life and work.

Take note of both policies and less formal norms that shape the culture, especially by talking with alumni and current students about their individual experiences.

3. Ask for what you truly need — from both your partners and your institutions.

Once you’re realistic about your roadblocks, enlist that boost to get over them. For me, that was time to work and write. Easier said than done, especially with constant urgent daily needs at home. I needed to ask for what I needed explicitly, including through grant requests. And once I had the guts to ask, I received financial support for childcare, which did indeed equal time (please refer back to #2 above!).

4. Try to use the gained time exclusively for school and work, despite all the other lower-hanging fruit that demands attention.

By creating fixed times and places for work, I sought to hold myself accountable, often committing out loud to others (including those who had no stake whatsoever) to finishing a page, section, or chapter.

5. Keep the things that keep you sane.

All along, when I managed to sustain the things that keep stress at bay — for me those are things like exercise and reading fiction before bed — I accomplished more. At first, these seem to take time away from work, but they are additive in the long run, generating more energy and greater focus for your fixed work times.

In taking on these challenges simultaneously, I certainly gave myself the gift of understanding and appreciating my own capacities for balance, living with imperfection, and finding the partnerships that continue to sustain me in my personal and professional life. I also showed my kids firsthand the extent to which our family values learning, growth, and supporting each other as we go after the lives we crave. I hope that image stays with each of them as they start to imagine their own careers and families, and the path to their future.

Dr. Deborah Skolnick Einhorn is associate dean for academic development at Hebrew College’s Shoolman Graduate School of Jewish Education and assistant professor of Jewish education at Hebrew College. She is the mother of three children, all of whom were gestated and delivered during her doctoral program.

Loss and Uncertainty :: A Fat Mom’s Swan Song One Year Later

By

Caitlin Hynes

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April 23, 2019

130 pounds

This is the numerical value of what I’ve lost in the past year. If you break it down into the simplest terms, in the most basic way to understand, I have lost 130 pounds. For those of you who do better with visuals, that is 130 packages of butter. In the course of one year, I have lost the equivalent of an entire middle school boy.

The past year, though, simply cannot be described by a number. Don’t get me wrong — I’m incredibly proud of this number. There might be days where I wish it were a little higher and days where I still actually can’t believe it, but overall, this number is just a small piece of my life that has changed since last April.

I’m not sure I can even describe everything I’ve lost in the past year. My marriage ended. I don’t get to see my son every day. Any sense of safety and security flew out the window. I lost what I thought was a certain future.

One part of me celebrates what I have lost — 130 pounds! I have a newfound sense of confidence and self-assuredness that comes with feeling so much better about my body and health. I stop and look in store mirrors and don’t cringe at the reflection. Do I suddenly think my body is perfect? God, no. Do I think it’s possible to be beautiful and plus-sized? Of course! That was just never how I felt about myself. I don’t think beauty is equal to size, but I was never comfortable in my skin for a lot of reasons.

The other part of me grieves for what I have lost. Divorce was never a word in my vocabulary. I never expected to start my life over in so many ways at 34 years old. There are times when I feel so empty and hollow without my old life. I miss my son like crazy when he’s with his dad. I’m so much more confident in some ways, but so much more critical of myself in other ways. Processing these simultaneous feelings can be exhausting, and there are nights I hit my bed exhausted from the mental and emotional demands of every day.

I never would have guessed how this last year would have gone. So I definitely cannot even begin to guess what will happen over the course of the next year. Uncertainty is pretty much all I’m certain of.